Connie's Journey - part 2

Read this passage and enjoy the isomorphic metaphor  of her journey, then think of your own; how could Connie's experiences teach you?

 

  The sounds of thought

 

After walking some distance Connie sat down by a stream and watched as the leaves and twigs floated by. She watched their colours and shapes, their swirling and turning and she relaxed. She looked into the crystal clear water beneath and saw fish swimming against the flow of the water with such grace and elegance; no effort, just appropriate movements which kept them where they wished to be. She watched as they glided towards their goal and with one swift movement sucked up the food, that which had held such concentration, only to return to their original place to begin again, their previous movements forgotten.

She touched the water. Fish darted out of sight only to re-emerge once she was still. The cold waters refreshed her, the fish enchanted her and she felt good. Removing her socks and shoes she dangled her feet in the waters and felt the tingling rise up her legs. She laughed relaxing in the pleasures of ‘now’. Without a care in the world she began to enjoy what she was feeling, with every breath she took she felt more and more alive, more and more at  peace.

As she sat she became aware of a stag on the other bank. Their eyes met and in that fleeting encounter she heard the stag as he lifted his head; ‘you come to this stream as I do to drink new life. You look into the steam and see all the life within. You know this flows through you and understand how easy it is to allow that life to flow when you relax enough and allow it so.’

As soon as he was there he was gone and she thought on what she had heard. She looked down into the stream at a fish swimming there. It attracted her attention; it spoke.

‘As the water moves fast I too move, when it moves slow I still move. I do so at the speed I need for my best life. Inside you is your best life waiting to move you like the waters do me.’ with a flick of the tail he was gone as were her thoughts.

She gazed into the distance and heard the trees around her as they swayed in the breeze. The rhythmn entranced her and she drifted into their song. ‘ we are the forces of life within. We take the sun’s power and create the world around as you create yours around you. We take these materials and hold the history of life within our memories. Only now are scientists beginning to understand how to read our rings as you are now reading yours. With every layer you will know far more and with each understanding you will grow more knowledge and as you do you will move towards being like the trees around you, tall, strong and content within your knowledge and understanding.’

Connie stayed for a while enjoying the connections she had made with herself and the nature around. She looked to the future and saw a garden filled with the abundance and variety only careful gardening could achieve. She saw a life more content and knew it would be so.

Slowly she replaced her socks and shoes with the certain knowledge she had changed. She did not question why or how, she just understood these changes were like the fish, adjustments to the flow of the stream. She knew where she wished to be and she was going there.

On standing she straightened her coat and trousers, smiled to herself. She had stolen time for herself and didn’t feel guilty. Trudging back to the car she couldn’t help herself, she laughed out loud. She laughed at the shear joy of being, she laughed at the release she felt inside. She knew if she told anyone she had heard animals talking they would lock her up! She knew what it was and thanked her unconscious mind. ‘Clever thing aren’t you’ she said.

Unlocking the car door, she jumped inside the car. She was excited. She was ready. She was off to begin the first full day of her life.

‘I am ready to start now!’ Looking in the mirror she was happy.

Connie’s story

This is a story with a twist; there are two ways of reading it, as a story and as an allegorical metaphor for states we often allow ourselves to get into. Spread over a series of blogs, this is Connie's story.

Connie had read the books and seen the programmes. She knew all about image and she had none of the qualities they talked about. She was fat, she was short, and she was imperfect. The woman had promised to help but she couldn’t see what she could do save take her brain out and transplant it! She sat down and the woman started to talk.

Connie found herself drifting off into a peaceful place. She stepped out of herself and looked. For the first time she looked without judgement. She looked at a woman who was far from perfect but had some very good features. Yes, she could do more with them. Mm, she really should stop hiding herself away in those baggy clothes; maybe use some make-up; why had she hated herself for so long? She couldn’t see the problem. As she stood there looking on she could hear the woman and what she was saying made sense. Yes, Connie knew, she did have the answers to her own problems she just needed to activate them, but would the conscious mind be willing to listen this time? The woman gave her some strategies which she could use to prompt the conscious into listening. She liked that, yes it would work. It would take time but yes, she could see that she would have to listen. The woman thanked her and she thanked the woman. Turning back towards herself she knew she would succeed.

“So would you like a cup of tea?” Connie opened her eyes and looked at the woman. Was that the time? Where had she been? “Yes, I’d love one”. She followed the woman into the kitchen and listened to her chatting about the garden and did she garden? What were her favourite flowers and what was her favourite time of year?

Connie faces the truth

Connie stood looking in the mirror; she hated doing it and had banned mirrors at home.

She had worn baggy tops and oversized jogging bottoms for many years and had hidden behind the baggy shape she had become.

Now she was being made to look in the mirror, now she was being made to really look at herself. Stripped of the baggy covering she had felt safe behind she saw what frightened her the most.

Herself.

“When you look in the mirror what do you see?”

Connie tried to look. She knew somewhere inside this frumpy cage there was a person who had had dreams and wishes, someone who had everything to look forward to. Now she was stuck and couldn’t see beyond the … she couldn't even say what ‘that’ was.

“Would you like to find the key?”

Connie felt a wave of emotion, she thought she would be sick. A way out, a way forward, but would it be safe? Would she be able to cope? The fear of someone offering here exactly what she wanted and yet offering her exactly what frightened her filled her to overflowing. She thought she would stop breathing.

“I will come with you. I have already been there. You wont die.”

It was as if the person knew her inner thoughts. She turned to the voice and crying, ran towards it. “Oh please, yes please. I want to move on. I am so frightened, but I want more than this. Yes please, take me with you.”